The Fire that Transforms us.
#MotherhoodtoMenopause
The Fire that Transforms us.
There is a secret that many women don’t discover until they’ve walked through the fire of menopause. A truth that reveals itself not in the hot flashes, the restless nights, or the shifting rhythms of the body but in what comes after.
Thank you @MenopauseMandate
On the other side of menopause is power.
Not the soft, accommodating strength we’ve been conditioned to embrace. Not the quiet endurance of pushing through, making do, holding everything together for everyone else. This is something different. Something fierce. Something unshakable.
Finding My Own Path
When I realized what was happening to me when the heat of transformation started rising in my body I didn’t try to suppress it. I didn’t see menopause as something to fight. I saw it as something to understand.
LaWanna Rine - The most talented herbalist I’ve ever known. She was 87 when I took this picture of her.
I went to see my mentor, LaWanna, the first person who truly taught me what it meant to live in rhythm with nature, to trust the body, to embrace its cycles rather than fear them. Under her guidance, I went through menopause holistically, working with my body rather than against it. I supported myself with herbs, nourishment, and deep self-care. I leaned into the process, honored it, trusted it. Many thought that I was crazy to try. There were times when I wondered the same, yet I knew that deep in my bones that hormone therapy was not for me, my body completely rebelled at the thought and I knew enough by then to trust her messages completely.
I already knew that birth control turned me into someone I didn’t recognize, but I had a deep moral conflict with Premarin, the only HRT available to me at the time.
Premarin (Pregnant Mare Urine) is the product of a brutal industry that keeps mares perpetually pregnant, confined, and stripped of their foals just days after birth. As a lifelong equestrian, this was never going to be my option.
Now, let me be clear, menopause is not a one-size-fits-all journey. Some women truly need medical intervention, and there is absolutely no shame in that and as a coach, I’ll often suggest it. But far too often, we are overprescribed, over-medicated, and told that menopause is something to be cured rather than experienced.
I am here to help those who want to try to move through this fire with as little intervention as possible, to support those who feel called to explore a different way.
Is this always possible? No. Every woman’s journey is different. But I have seen firsthand how powerful it is to trust the body’s wisdom, to work with the transition rather than suppress it. And I know this: on the other side is strength beyond anything you can imagine.
Redefining Aging
I’m 65.
No one believes I’m 65.
I’ve had no interventions, no fillers, no nips or tucks. The only tweakments I’ve indulged in is hair color because, well, it’s fun. My silver is finally starting to come in solidly, so that may be the next adventure..my husband loves it!
And I have energy…a lot of it. I have to. I’m a grandma, and my energy level has to match that of a two-and-a-half-year-old. Wolfie is a little wild thing who keeps me on my toes.
In my late 50s, when many people are slowing down, I became a certified health coach through the Institute for Integrative Nutrition. Because I wasn’t done learning. I wasn’t done growing. And I certainly wasn’t done living.
Our society makes women afraid to age. It tells us our value is in our youth, that our beauty and power fade with time, that we must fight the inevitable. And it’s sad because aging is inevitable. But it’s not about our age, it’s about how we age.
Maiden,Mother and Crone - Terri Foss . I love how the Crone stands here in between the Maiden and the Mother, holding the energy for both in their becoming.
The transition from Maiden to Mother to Crone is not a loss. It is a complete liberation.
The Maiden is full of curiosity and wonder. The Mother is full of purpose and care. But the Crone, oh, the Crone is something else entirely. She is the woman who has nothing to prove. She is free. Free from the expectations that bound her in youth, free from the endless cycle of giving more than she receives. She walks in wisdom, in clarity, in undeniable strength.
She now holds her blood for herself, no one else.
And when we step into that, we reclaim something no one can take from us.
Letting Go, Rising Up
Menopause is a great undoing. It strips away illusions about who we are, what we can endure, and what we are willing to carry. It forces a reckoning, a shedding of old skins, a confrontation with our deepest truths. And then, in the space left behind, something new emerges.
For me, menopause was not an ending but an initiation. I came through it stronger, clearer, more certain of myself than ever before. The things that once drained me, the obligations, the expectations, the weight of should and ought to no longer held the same power. I reclaimed my energy. I stopped apologizing for taking up space. I stepped fully into the woman I had always been becoming.
And that is the gift.
Because beyond the discomfort, beyond the shifting tides, there is an unbelievable strength waiting to be claimed. A fierceness that no longer asks permission. A wisdom that does not second-guess itself. A freedom that is hard-won and deeply earned.
Menopause is a doorway, not to decline, but to sovereignty. To standing in the center of our own knowing and saying, this is who I am now.
It is the moment we stop softening our edges to make others comfortable. It is the moment we stop pouring from an empty cup. It is the moment we realize that we are no longer here to please, we are here to live.
And when we embrace that, the world shifts. We shift. We move with a confidence that cannot be rattled, a presence that cannot be ignored. We become the elders, the guides, the women who carry fire in their bones and wisdom in their hands.
The Other Side of the Fire
So if you are in the middle of it, if menopause is shaking you to your core, if you feel unmoored, uncertain, or undone, know this:
On the other side is power.
Real power. Your power.
A power that has nothing to prove. A power that is steady and whole. A power that is yours to claim, without apology and without hesitation.
Walk through the fire. Let what needs to burn fall away. And when you step out on the other side, stand tall in the woman you have become.
Because she is unstoppable.
I’m always here if and when you’re ready to try something new.
With affection, always,
Beth
