One day, you wake up and realize—you have become invisible.

#motherhoodtomenopause

Not in some grand, supernatural way, but in a quiet, societal fading. The gaze that once followed you no longer lingers. The world, which once demanded your youth, your beauty, your softness, no longer seems to notice you at all.

For many women, this moment arrives like a loss. A slow vanishing. A realization that, in a culture obsessed with fertility, desirability, and youth, we are no longer at the center of the story.

But what if I told you—this is where the real power begins? In the center of our story?

Because here’s the truth: We are not losing something. We are being set free.

Freedom from the Gaze, Freedom for Ourselves

For so much of our lives, we are seen in relation to others. We are mothers, lovers, caretakers, muses—always something to someone. From girlhood, we are conditioned to be watched, wanted, pleasing, available. Whether we embraced it or resisted it, we existed under the gaze—the societal pull that tells us how we should move, how we should look, how we should be.

Then, one day, the world stops looking. And instead of mourning that loss, we can exhale. This was the experience , the awareness that I finally came to.

To be free of the gaze is to be free to belong to ourselves—to no longer perform, to no longer soften our edges for the comfort of others, to no longer shape ourselves into something digestible.

This is where the fire begins to burn differently. Not outward, seeking approval, but inward—fierce, steady, our own.

Holding Our Power, Holding Ourselves

In menopause, we no longer bleed. And yet, we are still full of life.

For the first time since our youth, we hold our energy for ourselves.

The ancient ones knew this truth. In many cultures, a woman who no longer bleeds becomes a keeper of wisdom, a holder of secrets, a force to be reckoned with. Before, my energy flowed continuously outward—given to creation, to the cycles of life. Now, it stays within, becoming a wellspring of power, a deep reserve that is mine alone.

This is why, in cultures that honor the passage of time, menopausal women are seen as leaders, visionaries, and truth-tellers. They have crossed the threshold, carrying with them not just experience, but the ability to stand in their power without apology.

This Is the Time Women Change Their Lives

This is not the end of the story. This is the moment women rise.

Look around, and you will see it—women leaving bad relationships, starting new businesses, writing books, moving to places they’ve always dreamed of, making art, claiming their bodies, setting boundaries that should have been there long ago.

This is the time when we realize we are no longer bound by expectation.

We no longer have to be attractive, accommodating, quiet, small.

We no longer have to ask permission to take up space.

This is the time when we stop waiting.

The world may stop looking at us, but we have never seen ourselves more clearly. And once we do, there is no going back.

The Choice: When to Be Seen, When to Remain Unseen

This invisibility is not exile. It is a cloak, a choice, a tool in the hands of the wise.

When we need to, we can move unseen—slipping through the world without the weight of expectation, existing for no one but ourselves. There is a profound relief in this, a quiet knowing that we owe no explanations, no performances, no permission.

And yet—we can also step straight into the fire.

Because the paradox of menopausal invisibility is this: the world may stop seeing us, but we have never seen ourselves more clearly.

This is the time when many women step into their greatest power—not because they are fighting to be seen, but because they now see themselves with absolute clarity. The distractions are gone. The illusions have burned away. And what remains is a woman who has nothing left to prove—only to claim.

Using the Fire, Instead of Letting It Use Us

The fire of menopause is real. It burns in our bodies, in our bellies, in our bones. It destroys what no longer serves and illuminates what has always been ours.

But fire can be wild and consuming. If we resist it, if we fear it, it can feel like it is burning us from the inside out. But if we learn to wield it, if we learn to trust it, then it becomes something else entirely.

It becomes fuel.

A power source, a knowing, a heat that can be directed toward whatever we choose.

Art. Love. Work. Revolution. Healing. Ourselves.

Creating a Life of Our Own Making

So my sister, if you have found yourself waking up to this invisibility, do not grieve. Do not believe the lie that you have disappeared.

Instead, ask yourself:

• What do I want, now that I do not have to be what others need?

• What would I create, if I was free from the weight of expectation?

• Where does my fire want to burn?

Because this life is now fully yours.

You do not have to ask for permission.

You do not have to wait to be noticed.

You do not have to perform for anyone.

You are free—to disappear when you wish, and to step fully into the light whenever you choose.

This is the power on the other side of menopause. This is the gift.

With affection always,

Beth