"Glamoury is an ability Witches have to transform themselves into something else. This is where our word “glamour” originated. Glamoury is more than beauty though—it is the projection of allure and charisma. Glamoury demands attention, reverence, and awe."
'The Three Witches from Shakespeares Macbeth'
by Daniel Gardner, 1775
"Georgiana, Duchess of Devonshire and Elizabeth Lamb,
Viscountess Melbourne – the most famous political
hostesses and society beauties of their day – are shown
gathered around the witches’ cauldron alongside their
friend, the sculptor Anne Seymour Damer"
It was Coco Chanel who once said “Nature gives you the face you have at twenty; it is up to you to merit the face you have at fifty.” I’m very sure that she was right.
I was recently looking at some old pictures of myself and was truly amazed. It was a composite of images of myself at 17, 25, 32, 45 and one taken last year at the ripe old age of 61. I looked in the mirror and realized that I quite enjoy what the passage of time has done to my face. I now have plenty of wrinkles and I absolutely love my collections of lipstick and perfume. I love the silver streaks that are glowing through my hair now. I love them and appreciate them as much as I do my Chanel lipsticks and Roja Dove perfumes.
I also refuse to lie about my age which gives me an extraordinary amount of pleasure. Besides, painting my lips when I'm going out gives me a chuckle as I remember my mother and how she was never without her lipstick. She knew what she was doing. She had a twinkle in her eyes that came from having lived life well. She never stopped learning and she never stopped leading the way. She was an example for me early on that you could be your true self and look pretty fabulous at any age. Up until the day she died my father was absolutely bewitched by her. More importantly she had all kinds of fun continually becoming that woman!
I consider myself very fortunate to still be surrounded by some pretty fabulous older women; all of them still physically beautiful , dynamic and brilliant. One will be turning 82 next month and one has just turned 87. Neither of them look a day over 70. They possess the adventurous spirits of the 30 somethings without all of the drama. They love high fashion and glorious cosmetics, thankfully using them without trying to hang on to any sort of dewy youthful glow. When I‘m hanging out with them I’m aware of a constant flood of images and stories that come only from having lived an exciting life and I’m acutely aware that only with new experiences do we continue to live that fully. One is writing a book and the other has a calendar of volunteer work that would exhaust most of us. I’ve only mentioned a couple of them but I am lucky to know many more. I am grateful for these friends as they give me a way to escape the constant flurry of advertising that tells all of us over 50’s that it’s time to roll over and die. These women don’t play dress-up; they are (as my niece says) “ All That!”
I want to be all of them when I grow up. In the absence of my own mother they are teaching me to step up confidently and lead the way.
I don’t know about you but I’m fairly stubborn and I don’t intend to age gracefully. I intend to age fiercely and fearlessly, sliding into my grave feet first and with a smile on my face born with the joy of having been alive! When I think about all of the older women who have inspired me, I realize that they all have this trait in common.
They crave new experiences. They are not afraid to have reinvented themselves, some of them many times in their life. They are not afraid to speak their minds and they have never stopped learning. They have ceased to worry about being beautiful because they know exactly what they look like and love to make the most of it. They know how to love and allow themselves to be loved, even when it hurts. Their elegant faces are lined with their smiles, tears and gorgeous shades of lipstick. They dress the way they like and ignore anyones criticisms. They practice yoga, go for long walks with their dogs, go to college and spend their free time painting or in meditation. They entertain with ease. They are the most amazing gardeners.
They are writing books and starting businesses. They hang out with lovely men and women , not because they have to but because they want to. Most importantly they have stopped wasting their time being afraid to die.
I think that this one aspect is the reason that my friends always seem lit from within every time I’m with them. Having faced the fear of old age from a very early age, they stopped worrying about what the future would bring and concentrated on creating a completely vital and totally interesting present while laying the groundwork for a fabulous future. They are all wise enough to have learned that physical beauty is just one small part of the package and that who they are inside is what shows up on their faces. If you’re going to get wrinkles anyhow, it pays to let them be created from living, not resisting the long path towards the inevitable. To be sure, living can be challenging at times, but would you really want it any other way? I’m of the opinion that we should absolutely demand of our lives what we really hunger for and then ruthlessly chase it down.
As one of my dear friends says, “ I love growing older because I’m finally learning how I really like to live!” proving to me once again that youth and sex are indeed totally wasted on the young! I’m reminded of one of my favorite philosophies on what it really means to live, by embracing death as the inevitable ending, not to be haunted, but instead to create your life powerfully every day. it’s a philosophy called Momento Mori.
“The Stoics used Memento Mori to invigorate life, and to create priority and meaning. They treated each day as a gift, and reminded themselves constantly to not waste any time in the day on the trivial and vain.”
So seize the day, your favorite lipstick and dance into your 50's and beyond like you've never danced before. Stop worrying about what has been. Live and love well and never leave home without planning for a bit of mischief to brighten your day.
My mother liked to say "Always remember to stay interesting dear because if YOU bore yourself to tears can you imagine how anyone around you will feel?"
Brava Bellissima!
I leave you with this remarkable poem….
“I counted my years
and realized that
I have less time to live by,
than I have lived so far.
I have more past than future.
I feel like that boy who got a bowl of cherries.
At first, he gobbled them,
but when he realized there were only few left,
he began to taste them intensely.
I no longer have time to deal with mediocrity.
I do not want to be in meetings where flamed egos parade.
I am bothered by the envious,
who seek to discredit the most able,
to usurp their places, coveting their seats,
talent, achievements and luck.
I do not have time for endless conversations,
useless to discuss about the lives of others
who are not part of mine.
I no longer have the time to manage
sensitivities of people who despite their chronological age, are immature.
I hate to confront those that struggle for power,
those that ‘do not debate content, just the labels’.
My time has become scarce to debate labels,
I want the essence.
My soul is in a hurry …
Not many cherries in my bowl,
I want to live close to human people, very human,
who laugh of their own stumbles,
and away from those turned smug
and overconfident with their triumphs,
away from those filled with self-importance.
The essential is what makes life worthwhile.
And for me, the essentials are enough!
Yes, I’m in a hurry.
I’m in a hurry to live with the intensity that only maturity can give.
I do not intend to waste any of the remaining cherries.
I am sure they will be exquisite, much more than those eaten so far.
My goal is to reach the end satisfied
and at peace with my loved ones and my conscience.
And per Confucius “We have two lives
and the second begins when you realize you only have one.”
Poem: Mário de Andrade - The Valuable Time of Maturity
Thymeless Quotes:
Do you have any wonderfully inspiring older women in your life? Favorite rituals for enjoying your life in the present moment? I’d love to know about them. Drop me a note in the comments or DM me on LinkedIn, Instagram or Facebook.
Glamoury Quote courtesy of Llewellyn Press
Just what I needed today, Beth!